;13 Things I’m Thankful For;

Today is a very special day to give back to the community and to show your loved ones how thankful you are for their love and support. There are alot of things to be thankful for that not very many people take time to think about. You have a roof over your head, clothes on your body, shoes on your feet, food on the table, fresh water to drink from. What more could you ask for? You’re probably thinking to yourselves ‘why should I be thankful for all of that?’. I’ve got just the right answer to turn your heads straight. Why shouldn’t you be thankful? How can you not be thankful? You could be suffering in worse condition. You could be sleeping under a bridge with torn up clothes, charcoal black feet, dirt to eat, and mud to drink. See my point? Exactly. I’m thankful for the littlest of things that seem as if they don’t matter, but in reality, they’re what makes us who were are and happens to be our only source of survival.

;13 Things I’m Thankful For;

  1. Every breath I breathe, that means I’m still alive.
  2. Every step I take, for I’m still able to walk.
  3. Every decision I make, for nobody can make those decisions for me.
  4. Every time I cleanse, for I’m washing away my sins.
  5. Every mistake I make, for I still am able to learn.
  6. Every sunrise, for God gives me an unpromised tomorrow.
  7. Every sunset, for I have a roof over my head and a bed to sleep in.
  8. Every birthday, for God has given me wonderful parents and lovely siblings.
  9. Every animal, for they’re able to sense sadness and even though they know there’s nothing they can do to help us, they continue to love us endlessly.
  10. Every plant, for without plants, people and a variety of animals wouldn’t survive considering we live off of plants and natural herbs.
  11. Every planet, for Astronauts wouldn’t have their jobs today if planets didn’t exist.
  12. Every living matter, for this world would never be the same without 7.5 trillon living matters.
  13. Every day, for we are not promised today or tomorrow.

No matter how bad you claim your life to be, none of us can act like our lives are perfect, because they aren’t. The truth of the matter is that we all struggle in our day to day lives. You wouldn’t believe if I told you that there is another human being halfway across the world who is going through what you’re going through. I’m being completely honest with you. You are never alone. And there is always a reason to be thankful. Take my words for it, considering I can’t claim to have a perfect life that I never had and never will have.

I’m thankful for my heart that stills beats, considering it has to work extra hard just to pump blood into my body. I’m thankful for all the opportunities I’ve been given. I’m thankful for my friends and family for being my support system. All the love and thanks to God for putting up with me for 14 years and for loving me and taking good care of me. I have a love for my Lord that is stronger than any other type of love and I didn’t even know it could exist. Thank you God. And thank YOU for reading this long, sappy, post about giving thanks. Man, you’ve sure got some patience. Thank you all for sticking with me and reaching the end of this. I love you all and I hope you’ve all had a lovely Thanksgiving filled with lots of love, food, and happiness! May the blessings continue to pour out and fill you with great joy. Lots of love πŸ’—πŸ’—



Friday the 13th 2015

There are many times where I wish I could scream and the whole world would hear me and feel all the pain my voice held. I’m an optimistic person most of the time, but like everyone else, I have good days and bad days. 
Today was just a day that I couldn’t wrap my head around. Last night, Paris made the news again. Terrosists attacked 6 different venues and many people were hurt and killed. They closed the French borders and turned off the lights of the Eiffel Tower. Different countries all around are showing their support by lighting up their big venues with the colors of the French flag. Times like these you never realise how lucky you are to be alive, but even then how lucky are you really? Nobody is safe if you think about it. No country can be safe from the dangers of our world. We could stop it, but it’d take all of our countries to unite as one. 
Today. Not my day. The morning started out with rain clouds filling up our Texas sky looking like they were about ready to start pouring water out of them at any minute. I woke up and got ready to shower. As I was rinsing off, getting ready to step out and wrap myself into a towel, I was just hoping that today would be a better day. 
The news of Paris just kept whacking me in the face and I couldn’t seem to wrap my head around the thought of why people would act so foolishly without reasoning. But then, I realised.
 These terrosists aren’t just attacking for no specific reason. Obviously they had to have had something happen when they were younger that scarred them for life and caused them to become the monsters they are today. I agree, it isn’t right. But just like you and me, they have daily struggles aswell. And although they could deal with their problems in a more human and natural way, they’re taking their anger out on the world. They blame us for whatever happened in the past, but what they don’t understand is that nobody is responsible for their past and their foolish acts other than themselves. They’re gonna be the ones receiving judgement over their acts, we won’t be receiving judgement over their acts, but ours. The foolish acts we pursue are on our own and are no way anybody else’s fault other than ours.
But like any other day, you get through it. And as I go day by day, I start realising just how much shorter life is getting. It isn’t getting any longer. And I would fear to hold a grudge against something and/or someone for so long, it would tear me up like an animal clawing at my insides.
The worst fear I have is making the biggest mistake of my life, and then in a split second God comes and the next thing I know, I’m being condemned to Hell by my Saviour and Creator. That is what would hurt me the most. Is having my life on a dead end with no choice of getting back up and redoing that moment over again to make it right.
That’s why no matter how clichΓ¨ the saying is, I stand by every single word and true meaning behind it. Never take life for granted because life is too short. Meaning, your heart, mind, body, and soul is a sacred ground and be content with what you have, not wishing for the things you don’t receive. Your life could end in a split second, and because you weren’t thankful for what you have and were just thinking about all that you couldn’t have, that is the sin of all sins.

Another secret of life. Don’t take life for granted, life is way too short, and trust me, it doesn’t get any longer.
#PrayforParis #PrayforourWorld #WorldPeace πŸ’œβœ¨

the secret of life

what do you do when you feel like there are weights pressed against your shoulders, pinning you down, and you cant move? thats a situation i have experienced many times during the 13 years ive been living that i have yet to discover.

i dont usually open up to strangers, but this is a special occasion. im not one whom likes talking about my feelings & emotions. im very well reserved and kept to myself. i dont like sharing my personal thoughts and opinions with other people, because my words are so easily taken out of context and detatched from its true meaning.

these are the four topics ill be expressing myself through today; love: judgement: confidence. need i remind you, once again, im not one to express my thoughts and feelings, im writing this because im wanting yall to hear where im coming from, to listen and to be there, but not to make judgements on my behalf. i would very much appreciate it.

starting out with love;

love is too good to be true. ill probably keep saying that until i fully experience that four-lettered word. people make love out to be this beautiful and exciting feeling, that feeling that just engulfs you into a warm embrace and makes you feel sick to your stomach, but love is more than just a kiss, a box of chocolates, and a bouquet of your favorite flowers. love can also be a roller-coaster ride of emotions. when youre in love, your emotions get thrown all over the place and the stressful thing is being able to glue those emotions back into place. not that i would know what love is or felt like. my first “break-up” was in 2nd grade and the boy only “broke up” with me because i wouldnt kiss him and he found a girl who would. ive never truly experienced love. after all, i am only 13. 13 year olds cant experience love. wait, i take that back. there are different types of love.

the first type of love is agape: the love of humanity, loving nature, and loving the people of the wild. the second type of love is philautia: self-love and respect. loving oneself and being content with oneself. the third type of love is pragma: love that endures. being there for one another. the fourth type of love is storge: family love. relations or very close friends. the fifth type of love is ludus: flirty, playful affection. the sixth type of love is philia: shared experience with friends, a team, a group, even co workers. and finally, we’ve come to the final type of love that tops everything. the seventh type of love is eros: romatically and/or intimately involved.

ive experienced all but one. i havent experienced that romantic love yet. im sure i will sometime in my life, and it doesnt have to be now, because im not ready for that type of love now.

 im scared of falling in love someday. im scared of getting my heart stomped on and shattered against my chest. im scared of alot of things, but ive also conquered alot of things. dont let emotions take you down. your emotions will shake you, break you, and shape you. things are going to happen, whether we’d like them to or not. but what do we do? we just deal with it.
judgement. not hard to figure out the definition of that word. we use it here and there, everywhere. this world is filled with the definition of judgement. if you weren’t born with it, you grew up into it. i grew up where the definition of humanity never seemed to matter anymore. i grew up with the definition of perfection. kindergarten, i was judged just because of how happy i was. my teacher despised me because i used to sing all the time in class. i was happy, however she wasn’t. her life wasn’t perfect so she wasn’t happy. my life wasn’t perfect and it still isn’t, but i could still find things that made me happy. as you grow older, judgement gets worse. i had great friends in elementary school, but once everybody got into middle school, things change. Things change, people change, and you start to lose your old friends. its unfortunate that some of the kids i use to go to kindergarten with dont even want to look at me anymore because im not like them. im glad i have the ability to see people for who they actually are then to just read the title of their book covers and automatically assume without actually knowing them. it does still hurt sometimes to know that people do look at me and automatically assume something that im not without even getting to know me down deep, but you gotta brush those people off and just shake it off. you are you and if people cant see you for who you truly are, then they must be blind. probably need to make an eye doctor’s appointment.

confidence. something that we all happen to lack from time to time. confidence was something i didnt have a year ago. it was hard for me to be confident when things were just crashing down, one after another, trying to knock me off the balls of my feet. i wasnt confident with my body or confident whatsoever with the way i was shaped and formed as a human being. i was in that stage of puberty where my voice was changing, i was starting to get pimples all over my face, and i was just embarrassed with my appearance. i still had my baby face and you know aswell as me how embarrassing it is when your grandma is visiting and tells you you basically still look the same as you did last time she saw you. ive learned that confidence is the key to success and the only way youre ever going to acheive your goals is being confident in who you are and your appearance. so i changed the way i viewed life and carried myself on through it.

that’s the secret of life. the way you carry yourself and look upon others can affect the way you feel and the situations you are put in. your decisions are based off of mental stability, the atmosphere of your thoughts, and God giving you a fish and telling you, you can either eat this and live a prosperous life or don’t, and you end up dying of starvation. in reality, it’s like God is handing you challenges in life and telling you, you can either go through it and come out stronger or don’t and stay the coward that you are.

life isn’t bad. life isn’t good. life is good AND bad.

the decisions you make and the way you carry yourself, reflects your future and your mental and physical stability. so do, go THROUGH the obstacle course. don’t, go TO the obstacle course and end up getting run in the dirt just because you were stupid enough to stand in the middle of the course and let your body give up. you can do it. i believe in you. God believes in you. and so do the planets, stars, the moon, the sun, and this tiny little sphere of blue and green of which we call Earth.

and that tiny little sphere of blue and green of which we call Earth, will be destroyed one day. not by swallowing itself whole, but by a raging fire which will burn every single thing we have ever owned. but it will be restored and all brand new. and if youre lucky enough, one day, you may be living your forever and youll be living in your old house, only renovated and the best of the best. but only if you have the courage to go THROUGH the obstacle course of life, not TO, and if youve completed the test of God.
thank you for taking the time out to listen to me and if you need me, i’m always here, always. lots of love πŸ’œπŸ’œ

god bless.


Happy Birthday Mom!

To the best Mom I know, here’s to you.

I remember when I was little, you used to tuck me in bed every night & you’d run your nails along my arms to comfort me until I fell asleep. I remember when I had nightmares, I’d run into your’s & Dad’s room with the legendary stuffed blanky I’ve had since I was born, & would sleep in your bed. I remember on Sunday mornings, I’d wake up early just so we could sit on the couch and watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse (hence the nickname that I have been called since I was born and still to this day) until it was time to get ready for church. I also remember that one time I thought I was cool for riding my bike with no hands & ended up falling off my bike in front of my 4th grade crush & rushed into the house to clean up the scrapes all over my legs and arms. Surprisingly, I didn’t even scream. Neither could you hear my cries. Tears were shed, but not a word was spoken. All I was worried about was that I had just embarrassed myself in front of the boy I was crushing on, I wasn’t even worried about the hole ripped in my pants or the stinging sensation after scraping up my body.

Well, 13 years later, everything’s slightly the same other than the fact that we’ve all grown older & don’t quite look the same as we did when we were younger. The difference is that I now tuck myself in at night, although I can’t manage to fall asleep without the TV on. But you still pray for me every night before bed. That hasn’t changed. I rarely have nightmares anymore, but when I do, I still come in your room to wake you up & let you know. We end up sprawling out in the family room watching old Disney Channel shows & talking until we fall asleep. We still wake up early on Sunday mornings & sit out in the family room watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse together until it’s time for us to leave for the nursing home. Oh, and don’t worry, I’m just as clumsy as I was 5 years ago. In fact, I not too long ago fell off my skateboard & ended up much worse than the bike incident. I had scrapes on my hands, arms, hips, and knees. Took a week to fully heal. & I’ve still got those scars. Yeah, so let’s just say I’m much clumsier than I was in 4th grade lol. Only difference is that not even a tear was shed. I’ve become much stronger over the past few years due to concurring events. All I did was flinch. And yes, it just happened by coincidence that I had happened to rip not one hole– but two holes in my pants. Yeah, karma doesn’t like me.

But my point here is even though I’m older now, age is just a number. Some things just never change. My Mother has & will always be my best friend. Through anything & everything. So, here’s to you, Mom. For always being there for me through all the rough patches we cross along the way. Life is a test of bravery, wiseness, loyalty, & strength. Bravery; stepping up when everybody else just stepped back. Wiseness; Walking with God, not behind Him. Loyalty; Commitment. Strength; Falling down a steep slope only to pull yourself back up and onto your feet.

You, my dear, have passed the test of Life. You are the bravest, wisest, most loyal, & the strongest Godly woman I know. And I’m proud to be your daughter. You’re not only my mom, but you’re my bestfriend too. What a gem you are. Give yourself a round of applause because of just how amazing of a person you are. You’re the best mother in the galaxy, you are my star. I wouldn’t & couldn’t trade you for the entire universe! Yes, by universe, I’m including Uranus, Saturn, Jupiter, Mars, Neptune, Venus, Mercury, planet Earth, & Pluto (Yes, I still consider Pluto a planet. I’m not believing the lies of NASA). Anyways, I hope you have the best day ever & I hope you enjoy that Kris Jenner Cookbook Ashlee & I got you. It should be here by Friday so It’ll be a little late, but a gift is a gift. Happy birthday mom, I love you so so so SO so much.


P.S. That is the only time I will ever use my nickname is for your birthday purposes only, because you know how much I despise that nickname, but I love YOU. Oh, & I spent only an hour just writing this so it is currently 1:39am. Goes to show just how much I love & care about you! 😊

The Journey To Success

I know, I know, I haven’t posted in a while. But I have a very good excuse for it. If you have forgotten, I work 2 grade levels each school year in order to graduate early. Ever since school started back up last month, all my focus has been directed towards my schooling and getting that finished aswell as starting my career. I’ll start with the whole schooling situation first.

I’m a freshman, for now. I’ve been working very hard on getting my 9th grade schooling out of the way and I’m just so focused on that now considering I only have one year left before graduation and I’m a perfectionist so I’m trying to make sure I have everything in order. So, you’ll be proud of me annoucing that I’m already halfway done with my 9th grade work and should be completely finished by Christmas. So, I should be starting up my 10th grade work by January time-frame. I’m relieved about that.

Now, as far as the whole career thing, I’ll try to keep this as short as possible. January 2015 I was walking around the mall and this girl around 17 or 18 came up to me and told me about this company called Barbizon (In case you don’t know what Barbizon is about, let me explain. Barbizon is a modeling and acting school that offers 6 month classes of training & preparation for the entertainment & fashion industry). Short story short, I got into Barbizon and went through a six month process of training & preparation. At the end of the program, you graduate and audition for the Barbizon Competition. Only a certain amount of students get chosen to participate in this life-changing experience. I was one of those students.

August 16th, 2015 was the day that could’ve been the beginning or end of my career. Luckily for me, it’s just the beginning. August 26th, 2015 I got signed to a modeling agency. I’ve only been with them for a month and they’ve taken me in as part of their family. I know I can count on them and trust in them to help me acheive my goals. I’m so so so so blessed and grateful and it’s still very unreal to me that is even happening. After so many years of applying and applying and applying to auditions, I have a better chance of getting into the industry now than ever. I thank God for this opportunity and I couldn’t be more thankful for all my family and friends supporting me and having my back through everything. All my hard work is finally paying off and I’m so happy and proud of myself for not giving up and for continueing to work harder and harder to get to where I want to be.

If you want something, chase after it. No matter how hard it gets. At the same time, manage to still stay young and true to yourself. Never let anybody tell you ‘no’. I’ve been told ‘no’ plenty of times, but I’ve learned to accept the fact that along with success, rejection comes with it. Rejection is all part of the process. If you just focus on acheiving those goals, then you won’t give up, and you will strive hard to succeed. But even with all of that, you have to have faith in yourself, faith in God, and faith in your family, friends, and the people you work with. Because faith will get you far. All your hard work will pay off once you put your heart, mind, soul, and body into everything you do.